“As immersive as it is vital, Progress Not Perfection breaks through societal stigma to help addicted individuals and their loved ones on the rocky, rewarding path to sobriety.”
The doctors tell me unequivocally that if I ever drank again, I would likely not survive.
I believe them.
Then I drink again.
This gut-punch of an excerpt comes from the prologue of Alison Ashby’s memoir, Progress Not Perfection. In just three sentences, the author shines a light on the crux of the book itself — the powerlessness that addicted individuals feel, mirrored in the helplessness that those around them experience in turn.
And this is only the beginning of an absolute livewire of a book — one that unveils the full scope of one woman’s long, arduous struggle to separate herself from the substance that’s killing her. Ashby displays incredible vulnerability as she puts her whole life up for the reader’s examination: the factors of her upbringing that first introduced her to alcohol, her brushes with the law, her experiences in residential treatment centers and the motivators that aided in her pursuit of sobriety. The result is a raw and unflinching look at addiction, a book that works to destigmatize the disease and to encourage empathy for — and to instill hope in — those who are struggling.
Fighting the Tide of Addiction
Ashby starts life out as what she’ll later come to know as a “third-culture kid” — in her case, the daughter of two English teachers stationed all across Europe. Ashby’s life starts in Spain, and she then moves to Italy and Germany before finally settling in the Azores, a smattering of islands within the Atlantic Ocean.
“It was in Germany that I began drinking,” the author shares within the first few chapters. “The drinking age was sixteen, or (as we joked) ‘whenever you could see over the bar.’” The habit follows her to the US, where at face value, Ashby is a devoted teacher, graduate student, social worker and newlywed. But that façade hides a turbulent sea of emotions — and, unhappy and isolated after a recent move to Minnesota, with her husband serving in Afghanistan, now is the perfect time for all that turmoil to rise to the surface. Addiction is a current that pulls Ashby under, which stifles her voice up until that first moment that she manages to utter the words, “I need help.”
Ashby does not shy away from the unglamorous reality of addiction. She catalogs it all: the DWIs and arrests, the relapses, the stigma and the shame. Along with the addiction itself, Ashby also discusses other traumatic experiences that compounded her risk of alcohol abuse — self-harm, sexual assault and disordered eating.
Healing and Growth
Suffice it to say, Progress Not Perfection is not an easy read, but that’s exactly the point. Ashby’s drive to write her memoir is not from a place of glossing over the messy parts of addiction, but instead to shine a light on a condition that is so often misunderstood, villainized and criminalized. To those struggling with addiction, or to their loved ones who are looking for a way to understand this disease, Progress Not Perfection is a book that says I see you.
Even with its heavy subject matter, the book doesn’t have an air of despair that would dissuade readers from diving in. The seriousness is broken up by moments of levity, and full of truly evocative writing. Readers will be able to feel the unforgiving chill of Minnesotan winters and the heat of southern Spain. But by far, the strongest element of this memoir is the amount of hope within its pages. Ashby describes the support she received in residential care, the welcoming atmosphere of AA, the thankfulness she has for her support network. Within the book’s pages is an incredible transformation, as Ashby now thrives in her role as an alcohol and drug counselor, working to help her own patients achieve sobriety just as she did.
As immersive as it is vital, Progress Not Perfection breaks through societal stigma to help addicted individuals and their loved ones on the rocky, rewarding path toward healing.
About Alison Ashby:
Alison Larson is a therapist and substance abuse counselor with a deep understanding of addiction, mental health, and trauma, stemming from both her professional expertise and personal experience. With a compassionate approach, she views individuals struggling with these challenges not as victims, but as survivors.
Alison helps clients navigate the complexities of addiction and mental health issues, working remotely full-time for Northland Recovery Center in Grand Rapids, Minnesota.
She earned a Master of Science in Social Work from the University of Louisville and a Master of Arts in Addiction Counseling from Hazelden Betty Ford Graduate School. Living in Florida with her family, Alison is committed to advocating for mental health and addiction recovery every day.
Publish Date: 1/23/2025
Genre: Memoir, Nonfiction
Page Count: 312 pages
Publisher: Gatekeeper Press
ISBN: 9781662950117