Ben Affleck found a new way to look at his mother after reading letters she wrote long before he and his brother became the center of her world. The Oscar-winner said those pages showed him a young woman with her own ambitions, interests and plans, giving him a fuller picture of the person he knew only as his mother.
Ben Affleck opens up about his parents’ deaths
Ben Affleck said the discovery came during a difficult period. His father, Timothy, died in April, followed by his mother, Chris, in June. During an appearance on Kerry Washington’s Street You Grew Up On podcast, Affleck said losing both parents so close together pushed him to reconsider his own childhood “in ways that has been a little bit different.”
The letters made one realization especially powerful for him. “This woman had her own whole life for 30 years that had zero to do with me.” Affleck said he came to admire his mother as “gorgeous and smart” and “passionate,” while recognizing how completely she committed herself to raising him and his brother.
He described a childhood routine that showed how much work she carried. His mother taught fifth and sixth grade at a public elementary school and finished at 2.30 p.m., but often stayed until around 5:30 or 6. After getting home, she handled family responsibilities while dealing with Affleck and his brother, whom he jokingly remembered as difficult children to manage.
His mother’s death also changed how Affleck viewed the years surrounding his parents’ troubled marriage. He said he felt “sad” for her because she deserved happiness and love. Affleck recalled that his father struggled with work, drank too much and grew “angry” and “resentful,” creating what he described as “a lot of friction” at home.
That tension shaped Affleck’s reaction when his parents finally told him they would divorce. He remembered being 11 and thinking, “I should try to look sad.” At the same time, he felt relief because the conflict between them had become so difficult.